Do your clients know the real you? Probably not. They might get nervous if they heard what you think about certain things or they knew what you do when you’re not at work. They might think less of your abilities as an attorney if they knew how much you don’t know. They might not hire you again if they knew how lucky you were the last time you represented them.

We all put on our best faces for our clients, our colleagues, and our neighbors. Everything is great. It couldn’t be better. Yeah, we’re really busy.

We never let them see us sweat.

Kurt Cobain said, “I’d rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.” Does this mean we should all be brutally honest about who we really are? No. Of course not. We’re professionals, not rock stars, and we’d never get away with it.

But then maybe Cobain didn’t get away with it either. If the point of being “who you are” is that you’ll be happier if you do, then clearly, Cobain didn’t get away with it. If he had been happy, he wouldn’t have checked out so early.

So keep up the facade. Don’t post that photo on Facebook (you know the one I mean) and don’t tell people what you really think about them, even when they ask.

We do a lot of pretending as lawyers. It’s part of the job. Our clients want to hire a successful lawyer, not someone who is struggling to figure things out. We must project confidence even if we don’t have a clue about what to do next.

But maybe it would be okay to let people see you cry once in awhile. Or to share your love for show tunes or The Three Stooges. Maybe what you think is embarrassing or inconsistent with the “stone cold” image of an attorney is just the thing that people will love most about you.

And if not, that’s okay. You can be massively successful even when a lot of people don’t like who you really are. Maybe because of it.

If someone thinks I’m a dork because I like The Three Stooges, I don’t let it bother me. I just poke them in the eye.

Are you embarrassed about your marketing? Don’t be. Get help here.