Treating your competition

December 4, 2025 by
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You read that right–”treating” your competition, not the conventional advice about “beating” them. 

It’s a different philosophy. 

Reach out to other lawyers in your niche or market and get to know them, or, if you already know them, get to know them better. 

See them not as a threat but as a friend. Not someone to “beat” but someone to work with.

Treat them to lunch, share your presentation or article, find something positive to say about theirs.

Yes, even though they might target the same cases or clients you target. Even if they are literally your competition.

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking I’m suggesting this because if these other attorneys or firms see you as a friend, you might get some referrals from them when they have a conflict or a case or client that’s not right for them. 

This is obviously true and how I started my practice. But the philosophy of reaching out to other attorneys in your niche goes beyond that. You can learn from them and be inspired by them, even if just by observing them. 

What are they doing that’s working? Maybe you can do it, too. What mistakes have they made? Perhaps you can avoid doing what they did. Who do they know you should know, if not by name but by category?

Why would other lawyers be willing to embrace you this way? After all, you might look at them as a friend or business asset, but most attorneys, raised on a zero-sum “beat the competition” mindset, are unlikely to see you the same way. 

Maybe. In which case, their reticence might become a self-sorting mechanism, showing you who might be worth knowing and who might be best kept at a distance. 

On the other hand, maybe your openness will unlock something in them that could be mutually beneficial. Maybe they would love to get to know you (or know you better), learn from you and be inspired by you.

In the end, it’s not about them. It’s about you. Your habit of seeing everyone as a potential friend and a willingness to see where that could lead. 

I know lawyers who are like that. Natural networkers, with lots of friends and contacts, and very successful practices as a result. 

It’s not the only path to building a professional practice, not something I’m good at or enjoy. But it’s something I’ve been willing to do over the years, and it has almost always led to good things.

We don’t have competition, you and I. Just people we don’t yet know, or know well enough to call a friend.

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Filed Under: Increase your income, Law office management, Legal industry, Marketing legal services, Networking, Relationship marketing

5-minute networking 

August 21, 2025 by
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Who says networking requires endlessly going to meetings and introducing ourselves to strangers? Why can’t we network with people we already know? 

We can, and we can do it in a few minutes. 

Go through your list of clients and business contacts, choose someone you haven’t connected with for a while, and send them a quick email or text. 

It might be a lawyer you worked with a few years before. A business contact you haven’t talked to in a couple of years. An old client or prospect. 

Anyone who might recognize your name. 

What do you say? You say hello and ask how they’re doing. 

You don’t need to say anything else, ask anything, offer to send anything, or suggest lunch. 

You just say hello. 

They might respond and say hello back. They might ask you a question, call you or invite you to lunch.

If they don’t, no harm, no foul. You’re not doing this to drum up business; you’re just keeping your name in front of people. If they want to talk to you, your message might prompt them to do that. If not now, eventually, when they need your help or know someone who does. 

Reach out to someone this morning, let them see you’re still around (and thinking about them), and enjoy the rest of your day. The next time you connect with them, good things might happen. 

If not, at least you didn’t drive across town after a long day of work and introduce yourself to strangers.  

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Filed Under: Networking

Networking for lawyers who hate networking

August 19, 2025 by
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Building a successful law practice often involves developing connections with influential people, resulting in referrals, introductions, and opportunities. As Jim Rohn used to say, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” If you don’t enjoy networking or haven’t been successful at it in the past, it might be because you’ve been networking with the wrong people. 

Who are the right people? Yes, professionals and business contacts who know the kinds of people who would be good clients for you, and the people who can refer them, but it’s more than that. The right people are people who inspire you. 

When we associate with people who inspire us, we feel inspired. If we associate with people who encourage us to do better, we do better. 

Not everyone who is doing better than you will inspire you, however. Their success might actually discourage you by setting the bar too high. You want to be selective and associate with people who not only have connections that are a good match for you but who encourage and motivate you to reach for the success you desire. 

Quantity doesn’t necessarily lead to quality. You can’t depend on finding the right people at a typical networking group meeting or by asking struggling business owners for introductions. 

A better approach is to put together a plan to meet the most influential people in your target market. 

That means doing a little research. 

Learn all you can about the leaders in your target market and don’t rush to connect with them. Give it time. The right opportunity to meet them will eventually reveal itself to you.  

In the interim, work on developing your authority and desirability as a networking contact. Work on your public speaking, publish articles, write a book, get some publicity. 

Get people talking about you. Become the person you would like to meet. When you do, networking will be easy for you because influential people want to associate with other influential people. 

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Filed Under: Marketing Plan, Networking

Your 5-second introduction 

July 17, 2025 by
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“Hi, I’m Joe. I’m a business attorney here in Small Town.” Within seconds, most people won’t remember what Joe said. 

Joe’s introduction is accurate but forgettable. It tells people who he is, not what he does, for whom, or why it matters. 

We can do better. 

It’s as simple as showing new contacts a picture. Something they can see in their mind’s eye, and immediately appreciate your value—the reason clients hire and trust you. 

It doesn’t need to be clever. Five seconds isn’t enough time for cleverness. Not enough time to get into detail or tell any stories. That can come later, if there is more time, or you’re on a stage. 

For now, tell them what you do, for whom, and why it matters. 

What problems do you solve? What benefits do you deliver? What kind of clients do you help?

That’s all you have time for, but it’s enough. Enough to get your new contact to see your value and remember you. Because if they have or have had the problem you mention, or are close to someone who has, your message, however brief, is going to resonate and stick with them and open the door to hearing more. 

Which is all you can hope for in a 5-second introduction. 

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Filed Under: Marketing legal services, Networking

Maybe you need some new friends

July 2, 2024 by
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Not friends necessarily, business connections—influential people who can send you referrals, introduce you to key people in your target market, give you information or advice, or inspire you. 

Your business network, which you should continually expand and improve.

Start by identifying categories of people you’d like to know. “Business leaders in the health care field,” for example. Then, make a list of candidates—names of people in that field—and learn as much as possible about them and their industry or market. 

Then, find someone who knows them and ask them to introduce you. Or, reach out yourself, tell them you’ve heard good things about them, and want to introduce yourself.

Ask them something about their company or association or news about their industry. Ask questions. Let them do most of the talking. Listen and learn. 

Follow-up with an email telling them you enjoyed meeting them.

What’s next?

You might see an article about the health care industry and send a copy to your new contact. Or write an article and send that.

You might follow up with a question, ask for advice, or invite them to speak at an upcoming event where you know the organizer. 

If you meet someone else who knows them, you might compare notes. Learn more about the contact, what they do, who they know, and what they want. If you hit it off, you might invite them to coffee. Or that might come later. Months later. 

Stay in touch with them. Be of value to them. Find ways to help them or someone close to them. Don’t ask for anything just yet. That time will come. 

Or it won’t.

You don’t know what will happen and you might need to meet many people before you find one who clicks with you. 

But one might be all you need.

Here’s how to do it

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Filed Under: Marketing legal services, Networking

Size doesn’t matter

May 24, 2024 by
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I’m talking about your list of professional contacts. It’s the quality of your contacts that count, not the quantity. A list of 10,000 people who might recognize your name (or might not) isn’t nearly as valuable as a list of 100 who will take your phone call, reply to your email, or smile when they see you. 

You know, people who know you.

Because if they know people who need your services, or know people who know people who do, you’ve got it made. Even if it’s not a big list.

 Because it’s not who you know. . . it’s who THEY know. (And will introduce you to).

Do you know a professional or business executive who is influential in your target market? Do you know them well enough to ask for a favor? 

Great! Ask them to introduce you. 

If you know the name of someone they know you’d like to meet, ask them by name. “You mentioned you know Jack Bigtime. I’ve heard good things about him and would love to meet him. Would you be silling to introduce us?”

If you don’t know anyone they know by name, ask by category: “Do you know anyone who (describe the kind of contact you’d like to meet).” If they say they do, ask for a detail or two to get them thinking about them, maybe ask how they know them, and then ask if they would introduce you.

If they ask why, tell them the truth—you want to expand your network. Just an introduction. Not marriage. One professional meeting another, the way it’s done every day. 

You may have to talk to a few people to find someone who knows someone who would be a good fit for you and will introduce you (or let you mention their name), but all you need is one. 

Because one will lead to two. And that can lead to dozens. 

Yes, you could play the “quantity-leads-to-quality” game most professionals play, work like crazy and eventually meet someone who’s a good contact for you. But the “quality-leads-to-quality” game is much more fun, and productive. 

Here’s how to do it

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Filed Under: Networking, Referrals, Relationship marketing

Business development leapfrog 

May 1, 2024 by
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It’s all about networking. Meeting people who know people you’d like to know. High-level decision makers, General Counsels, CEOs, advisors, business owners, and other influential people in your target market. 

Your job is to identity people you’d like to meet and work backwards to identify people they know who can introduce you. Eventually, you identify someone you already know or can easily meet because they belong to a group you belong to or know people who do. 

Start with “categories”—types of advisors or professionals or decision makers in your target industry or market. When you know you’d like to meet a financial advisor, General Counsel or manager of medical groups (of a certain size or specialty), for example, it makes everything easier. 

Create a profile. Then, identify “candidates”—actual advisors or decision makers you’d like to meet. Then, talk to your clients and existing business contacts and ask if they know these people, or know someone who does. If they do, ask them if they would introduce you, or if it would be okay for you to mention their name when you talk to them. 

And yes, it is as simple as that. 

You don’t have to score a home run every time. A single or double here and there may be enough to get you face to face with someone who wants to know more about what you do and how you can help their company or their clients. 

If you “only” meet one or two of these top-level decision makers per year, it can lead to a lot of business. 

It’s all about networking. But you don’t have to attend a single networking event. 

Because the people you already know, know people you’d like to know, and you can leverage your relationship to meet them. 

Here’s what to do, step-by-step

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Filed Under: Networking, Referrals

People lead you to people

February 27, 2024 by
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Some people can hire you. Some can’t. Or won’t. Some people can send you referrals. Some can’t. Or won’t. 

Here’s the thing. It doesn’t matter what someone can or can’t do. They know people you don’t know and can lead you to them.

Your new client might know no one who needs your services. But their boss, accountant, neighbor, or friend might. It’s not who you know, it’s who they know and can lead you to. 

You still need to be refer-able. You still need to get introduced or have your contact give them your card or a link to your website. But it gives you a path. A modus operandi. When you meet someone new—online or in person, through formal networking, speaking to a new client or prospect, or chatting with a stranger in line to get coffee, your job is to find out who they know. 

Emblazon it on your brain. “Who do they know?” (Or “Whom…” if you were an English major.)

If they mention they work at a certain company, find out what they do there and who they work with. Do they know any of the executives, directors, vendors, or shareholders? Do they know anyone who does?  

You might start by asking if the company has in-house counsel or works with an outside firm. It would be good to meet those lawyers. Even if they are your direct competitor, they might have a conflict or otherwise be unable to represent a client or take a case (e.g., too big, too small, wrong industry, etc.) and might refer them to you.

NB: get to know other lawyers.

What if your client or contact doesn’t know the in-house counsel or hesitates to introduce them? Pick up the phone, call that lawyer, tell them you have a mutual business contact (the employee at their client’s company) and want to introduce yourself and find out more about what they do. (Psst, and who they know). 

It works the same way with everyone. When you sign up a new client, find out the name of their insurance broker, accountant, financial planner, or attorney. 

More people you want to know.  

As a friend of mine used to put it, “Don’t look ‘at’ them, look ‘through’ them—because it’s not who you know, it’s who THEY know. 

My guide to Lawyer-to-lawyer referrals

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Filed Under: Networking, Referrals

Networking Up

November 21, 2023 by
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You want to meet and network with the owner, the senior partner, the manager, or the top executive. You know, the decision maker. The one who can hire you or send you referrals. 

But that’s not always easy to do.  

One solution is to start at the “bottom” of the totem pole—junior staff or a lower-level employee—and work your way up. 

Ask them to introduce you to their boss or someone higher up the food chain and continue this process until you reach the head honcho. 

At least that’s what one networker says he does. He says it’s easier to learn about the company and the people who work there or own it, and easier to build trust with them.

Sounds like a plan. 

But there are other plans, like the one where you start with the person at the top. 

It will probably be more difficult to meet them, but if you do and you hit it off with them, welcome to shortcut city. 

On the other hand, the top people are constantly approached, assume you are a Klingon and have their shields up. Especially when they meet an attorney. 

If (when) that happens, don’t push it. Ask them who you should with at the company or in the group. If that person is at the same meeting, ask them to point them out to you. They will be probably introduce you.

If not, you’ve got the name of the person you should speak to and when you approach them and tell them, “Mr. Big suggested I speak with you” they’re going to pay attention because they don’t want to step on Mr. Big’s toes. 

Instead of “networking up,” you’re “networking down,” and they both work.

If you can meet the top dog at the company or group, go for it. If not, meet anyone and work your way up. Or sideways.

There’s more than one way to win friends and influence (the right) people. 

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Filed Under: Networking

It’s not who you know

October 3, 2023 by
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It’s who they know. Which means you don’t need a large network to build a successful practice. Just a well-connected one.

If you know just 10 people who are influential in your target market, they can lead you to a multitude of new clients and referral sources. 

Lessons? 

  1. Stop wasting time networking with the masses of people who aren’t influential in your market. Focus on the “precious few” who can send you a lot of business or introduce you to other influential people in your market. 
  2. Identify people you want to know by name, and work out a plan to meet them. 
  3. Start with people you already know. Go through your list(s) and identify 5 contacts who are influential in your target market and like and trust you. Spend more time with them. Find out who they know and ask them to introduce you. 
  4. Next, draw up a list of 25 or 30 people you don’t know but would like to. They might be high quality prospective clients or other centers of influence who appear to know the kinds of people you would like to meet. Ask the people you know if they know any of these people and, if so, ask them to introduce you. 
  5. Study the people you identify. What do they want or need? Who do they know? How can you get their attention? What can you do to help them and/or their clients or customers? 

And then get to work meeting these new people. 

You might have to go through quite a few people before you find the ones who are receptive to meeting you and eventually working with you. 

But you only need a few. 

This will help you do all of the above

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Filed Under: Marketing legal services, Networking
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