Make it personal (even if it’s not)

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Thousands of people are reading these words right now, but as far as I’m concerned, it’s just you. When I say something or ask a question, I’m not asking or speaking to everyone. 

Just you. 

If you want to get more people listening and reading, more people responding, sharing, and liking what you write (and ultimately hiring or referring you), you should do the same.

When you write, write to one person. Not “everyone”.

Even if you’re writing a blog post or newsletter article, or speaking from the stage—even on social media. Write or talk to one person. Don’t call for a show of hands, don’t address everyone in the aggregate, don’t say, “I’m wondering what y’all think about this?” And whatever you do, don’t say “Hey gang!” (my personal pet peeve). 

As far as your listener is concerned, there’s nobody else there. Don’t bust that bubble, however fictive it might be.

They’re sitting in their office chair or propped up in bed, reading your words or listening to your voice, and for a moment, hearing a personal message from a friend. When you speak in the collective, it puts distance between you and the reader. Communication is most effective when it is personal. 

So, make it personal. 

That also means writing from your perspective, not “for the firm”. Tell the reader what you think about the subject, what you did yesterday, what you plan to do later today. Tell them to call you, not “the office”. 

“Talk” to them as though you were sitting together, having a chat. Because, virtually speaking, you are. 

How to write an effective blog

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Why you need a story diary

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You are a storyteller. You tell them to friends, colleagues, clients, and juries. You put them in blog posts, articles, and presentations. You use them to make a point or share a light moment. 

Stories are how humans connect with each other. They help us win friends and influence people. 

And you need a steady supply of them. 

Where do you get them? By keeping your eyes and ears open and noting what other people talk about, write about, and do. You get them by observing your world. 

The best stories are usually about things you did or that happen to you because you have an emotional connection with those stories (and the people in them).

You solved a problem, did something new and interesting, or met someone who made an impression. When you share these stories, you help people understand, appreciate, and remember your message. 

And you.

When you talk about a troublesome case, for example, you help the reader or listener step into your shoes, see what you saw, and feel what you felt. It’s an effective way of illustrating something important or something you care about and think your audience will, too. 

Now, since stories are so valuable, you should create (or expand) the habit of collecting them. 

Set up a “story” file and add notes and articles and quotes you might use someday. In addition, take two-minutes at the end of each day and make a note of what you did (or saw or heard) that day. 

Who did you speak with? What problems did you solve or work on? What did you see or hear?

Did you sign up a new client? Settle a case? Improve a skill or start learning a new one?

Record your day in a diary or journal. You don’t need to write out the entire story. Just jot down enough details to help you remember it when you want to use it.

Your journal will make you a more effective writer, speaker, and communicator. It will help you win more friends and influence more people.

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Talk to me, baby

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A few thoughts about talking to people you want to like you, hire you, and follow your advice. 

First, assume they’re nervous; say something “neutral” to break the ice. Ask about the traffic or parking, or how they found you. If you know something about their problem, and it’s bad, acknowledge that up front. 

If you’re in person, make eye contact. And smile. So simple, and so effective at showing them you’re listening, you care about what they say, and you’re a nice person. It makes them much more likely to like you and listen to you. 

You want them to do most of the talking, so ask open-ended questions to get them to do that. Ask appropriate follow-up questions to clarify what they say (and show them you care about getting it right). Then, repeat their important points back to them, to give them a chance to hear what they told you, e.g., “So, what you’re saying is…”, and thus, prompt them to confirm it, change it, or add to it. 

And again, to show them you’re listening. 

If you feel the need to correct something they said, be gentle. 

Share information, but don’t show off how much you know. And, whatever you do, don’t talk all about yourself. Talk about them, their legal matter, and the options available to them. 

Take notes. Let them see you writing what they say, or hear you typing or scratching if on the phone. It tells them that what they say is important, you care about accuracy, and you want to do a good job for them. 

Finally, ask them to tell you if there’s anything else they want you to know (but might not have mentioned). 

They might tell you something important, but if they don’t, they’ll appreciate your thoroughness and that you let them get in the last word. 

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Better than other lawyers? Could you be more specific?

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You want prospective clients and the people who can refer them to see you as the better choice. But saying you’re better, or your services are better, or your “service” is better, isn’t convincing. You need to tell them why. 

How are you better? What do you do other lawyers don’t do and why is that a benefit to your clients? 

You need some “better” adjectives. 

Here are a few to consider and the meaning behind them:

  • Faster (You get the work done more quickly; your clients can enjoy the benefits and peace of mind sooner)
  • Efficient (Modern methods, tech, allow you to deliver high-quality work product at lower expense)
  • Reliable (You don’t cut corners and put your clients at risk; highest standards, ethics, proven methods) 
  • Transparent (You explain everything and show your clients everything you’re doing, when and why, and invite them to ask you anything) 
  • Reasonable (Fairness: fees, costs, procedures)
  • Comprehensive (Your documents and processes are thorough and cover everything your clients need and want)
  • Simpler (Your documents, processes, fees, billing, are easier for your clients to understand; fewer questions, confusion)
  • Newer (New services, methods, content, partners, employees, offices, computers, and how your clients benefit. Careful, though; “new” implies risk, so make sure you address this.)
  • Guaranteed (No fee unless recovery, no fee unless satisfied; yep, money-back guarantee. If that makes you nervous, put a limit on it, e.g., first 30 days or “up to X dollars”) 

They all mean “better” but tell clients why you are better. Make sure you prove everything, however, by providing examples, specific numbers, and by answering FAQs and objections in advance. 

Stress-free legal billing and collection policies

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Hope and opportunity

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That’s really what you sell. Your legal services are merely a means to an end. 

Clients want their problems to be fixed. They want to recover their losses and be protected against future harm. They want their pain to stop and the pleasure they seek to start. 

And they want to know they have you by their side, fighting for them, defending them, advising them, and helping them achieve their goals.

Hope and opportunity. That’s why they hire you. And your presentations, articles, and conversations should feature these. 

Clients aren’t especially interested in how you do what you do. They want to know that you can and will help them feel better and sleep better and be more prosperous. Clients choose you because of how you make them feel. They stay with you and tell others about you because of how you continue to make them feel.

In your marketing, talk mostly about the big picture, the benefits, and not so much about how you do what you do. 

Other lawyers may point to their impressive track record, but clients will choose you because you did something those other lawyers didn’t do. 

You made them feel good about themselves and their future.

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I don’t know

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We tell clients that if they’re not sure about something, it’s okay to say “I don’t know”. In fact, we encourage it. But when a client or prospective client asks us a question and we don’t know the answer, we’re often uncomfortable “admitting” we don’t know.

Because we’re supposed to know. 

And if we don’t know and we should, or the client thinks we should, we look bad. So we avoid answering the question directly, change the subject, or stall. 

That can be even worse. 

It makes it look like you’re hiding something, aren’t the expert we purport to be, or want them to cough up more fees before we answer what the client believes is a simple question. 

What should we do? 

I don’t know. No, really, it’s one of those things that doesn’t have an easy answer. 

Is it a complex issue? Unsettled law? Unclear fracts? What is your relationship with the client? What do you need to ask them before you can provide a complete and accurate response? How much time is available to answer?

And, is it the type of question you ordinarily get paid to answer?

Clients don’t expect you to know everything. Or tell them everything. But you should tell them something. 

Tell them what you do know, or tell them some of the issues that make it difficult to answer on the spot. And then tell them you need to do some (more) research, ask them (more) questions, or give it some thought.

Or tell them there are issues that are outside the scope of your practice area and you need to consult with (or refer the client to) another lawyer.

Of course you could also just tell them you don’t know or you’re not sure and, say it with me, “you don’t want to guess”.

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Keeping it simple doesn’t make you a simpleton

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In your job as an attorney, one of your top priorities is to get people to understand you and see that you understand them. That’s true whether you’re negotiating, speaking on stage or in front of a jury, or writing a brief, a blog post or a demand letter. 

Generally, that requires being clear and precise, using simple words, and presenting your ideas in a logical order. 

But it can take some work to get it right. 

When I first started practicing, I thought I needed to impress people with a big vocabulary and a formal writing style. I wanted to sound like a lawyer but, looking back, I’m sure I either confused people or made them laugh. 

How did I change my wicked ways? First, by deciding it was important, and then rewriting, editing and polishing again and again until I found the right balance. 

I worked at it and still do today. Because it’s worth it. 

Unless there is a very good reason for using a formal writing style, or a ten-dollar word when a .50 cent word will do, don’t do it. It makes you look like you’re trying to impress people and makes people wonder why you feel the need to do that. 

Similarly, don’t dumb down your message, or use emoticons or the latest buzzwords just because all the cool kids do. 

You’re a lawyer. Sound like one. Just not one one who is overly impressed with themself. 

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I like pain. It feels so good when it stops. 

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Why do people hire you? Because you help them solve their problems and alleviate their pain. Or protect them from problems that could cause them pain.

Sometimes, they think they can do this themself. Or they don’t realize how bad things could get and they wait.  

You need to splash cold water on them and wake them up. 

Tell them why they shouldn’t try to fix things themself and why they shouldn’t wait. 

Tell them why they need to call you now.

Tell them they should at least find out their options (and risks), and give them examples of clients who didn’t do that and suffered. The clients who didn’t listen when you told them to have you review that contract before they sign it or ask you about their problem when it was small and relatively easy to fix. 

Talk about the pain this cost them. And then talk about the clients who took action, and how everything turned out okay. 

You know the drill. 

Of course “prevention” is a harder sell then “cure” so when you’re talking about what could happen if they don’t talk to you or follow your advice, be a little dramatic about what can happen—you’re doing them a favor.

Use their fear to motivate them to act.

One way to do that, especially right now, is to talk about the economy. Inflation, foreclosures, losing their job, credit card debt, the rising cost of feeding their family—it’s on everyone’s mind, especially the people who need to talk to you the most.

They’re in pain and afraid things will get worse. Agree with them, and then tell them how they can get relief. 

People do things (and hire lawyers) for two reasons: pain and pleasure.

Make sure you talk about both. 

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It’s not just what you say, but when you say it

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It’s called “staging” and it makes your written or spoken message more effective by putting your points in the most effective order. 

For example, you stage your material when you start an article or presentation with the problem, not the solution, and follow that by explaining the risks of ignoring the problem or choosing a poor solution. 

After you describe the risks, you build on that with examples of what might happen, the costs, delays, pain and suffering, and secondary problems that can occur. 

Now, you have your reader’s attention and the desire to hear the solution. When you then describe the solution, e.g., your services, they’re all ears and ready to know what to do to get this solution. 

You tell them what to do, e.g., call, fill out a form, etc., and to seal the deal, you tell them the benefits of taking that next step—clarity, relief, a proven plan of action, saving money, etc. 

That’s staging. That’s using a logical order to improve your audience’s understanding, build tension, and show them a way to release that tension precisely when your reader or listener is most likely to do it.

But staging isn’t just the order in which you present the elements of your message. It’s also about how you transition from one element to the next. 

Want an example? (There, “Want an example?” is an example of a transitional phrase that pulls the reader forward to the next element, in this case, an example).

Transitional phrases keep readers reading and listeners listening. They do that by asking questions and painting pictures in their mind with statements that get them to focus on an image or feeling, ready to hear more.

There are many ways to accomplish this. For example, you can ask, “What do you think might happen if. . ?” and letting their imagination do the rest. Or, “Imagine how you’ll feel when you no longer have. . .”. 

You can also use transitional phrases to transition to your call to action or close. 

A few examples:

“At this point, there are 3 questions you should be asking yourself. . .”

“When I show this to people, they usually tell me/ask me. . .”

“Here are your options. . . which one makes the most sense to you?” 

“If this describes your situation, here’s what I recommend. . .”

Think of this type of transitional phrase as a palate cleanser, making the reader ready for the next course. 

Anyway, this is just a brief introduction to staging and transitional phrases. You don’t need to be a marketing expert or copywriter to use them. But do pay attention to how others use them in their writing and presentations, and consider how you might use them in yours.

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It’s easy and well-worth doing

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We’re talking about “edification”—the art of making other people look good by saying nice things about them. 

When you introduce someone to a client or friend, or introduce a speaker to an audience, and edify them, the other person or the audience sees them as more valuable, worth listening to, knowing, or hiring. 

And when you edify someone, your kind words and the graciousness with which you deliver them also make you look good. 

It doesn’t have to be exhaustive. You can simply mention a few of the speaker’s or other person’s accomplishments. Tell them about their book, their business or practice. Tell them about an award they received or a notable victory they obtained, or quote what others have said about them, e.g., testimonials or reviews. 

What do they do that helps people? What is their mission? What is something about them you admire?

You don’t have to exaggerate. Just say something laudatory and true. 

If you don’t know them, you need to learn something about them you can use when you introduce them. Read their bio or their “about” page, or simply ask them what they would like you to mention when you introduce them. 

Of course, the best edification occurs when you’re able to relate your personal experience with that person, or what your clients, business contacts, or friends have told you about their experience with them. If you refer a client to another lawyer, for example, tell them what that lawyer has done for you or for your other clients. 

In short, tell other people why they should listen to the person, watch their training or presentation, sign up for their newsletter, buy their products, or hire them.  

One more thing. 

You should also equip your clients and contacts to edify you. 

Give them information they can use when they introduce you or refer people to you. Even better, give them the kind of experience as their lawyer or friend that makes them want to tell everyone about you. 

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